Expensive: 1 - 5 minutes
When:
- With overwhelming emotions
- With dissociation or the feeling of not really being there
- During or after a flashback or re-experiencing
- For sleeping, to let go of tension and ground yourself in the here and now
Introduction
Trauma can make you feel like you’re lost. You may be primarily concerned with survival: avoiding triggers, regulating stress, getting through the day. That can feel empty and meaningless. Values can then serve as a kind of compass: they guide your choices and actions, even when pain and discomfort remain present.Â
Values are not about goals that you can tick off, but about what you value in life. Like connection, honesty, or caring. When you have clarity about what is important to you, you have something to hold onto. Even small steps towards your values can help you feel stronger and more connected to yourself.
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This is how you do the exercise
- Take the time to reflect on various aspects of life: friendships and relationships, study and work, health, personal growth, meaning and spirituality.
- Write down in each area what you find important in it. For example: in relationships → Be reliable, in health → Taking care of myself.
- Choose one value that feels most meaningful to you right now.
- Ask yourself: What is one small step I can take today towards this value? For example, sending someone a message, cooking a healthy meal for yourself, or going for a walk.
- Take that step consciously, and pause to consider what feeling that gives you.
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Background
Working with values is central in Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT). They form the compass that helps you make choices that are meaningful, even when painful experiences remain present.
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