After experiencing traumatic experiences It is very normal to suffer from negative thoughts. Trauma can do a lot to your self-image and evoke feelings of guilt or shame. In addition, our brain is wired to pay more attention to negative thoughts than to positive ones. The amygdala (the brain region that signals danger and activates the stress system) plays a major role in this.
As a result of trauma, this part is often overactive, causing negative thoughts to be present faster and more strongly. During stress or fatigue, they also take over more easily, and it is harder to calm yourself down.
It is not realistic to think that you can make negative thoughts disappear completely. Nor is that necessary. However, you can learn to see that thoughts are not necessarily true. You have thoughts, but you are not them. They do not have to determine how you feel or what you do.
With conscious attention and practice, you can learn to direct your energy toward thoughts that help rather than hinder you. Unhelpful thoughts can make it difficult to achieve your goals. Helpful thoughts, on the other hand, can contribute to more positive feelings and behavior. For example, it can help to view challenges as opportunities to grow. You can then notice how changing your mindset influences your feelings and actions.
It might sound crazy, but sometimes it also helps not to take yourself too seriously. After all, thoughts are not facts. You can ask yourself: “Is this thought correct?” en “Does this thought help me?” Sometimes you cannot figure that out on your own. Or these questions lead to an inner conflict. It can then be valuable to talk about it with someone; a friend, someone you trust, or a therapist.
Detaching more from negative thoughts often takes practice. Your brain has gotten used to certain patterns and it takes time to change them. By repeating, visualizing how thoughts are allowed to drift by, and consciously pausing at the thoughts you actually want to hold on to, you train a kinder and more flexible way of thinking step by step.
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